The Paul Town Interview

Paul Town all but disappeared in 2018. Like the A-Team, the real A-Team, from the television show, Paul can be found. In my case, I was given Paul’s contact by an odd account on Twitter. It wasn’t odd like autistic odd, it was odd because of the presence it had, I felt like the account was in the room… there was an ambiance.

I was a big time Paul Town Orbiter. Paul Town the man taught me a lot. Paul Town was big time. He has been featured in a vlog post by Ben Shapiro, mentioned in Bloomberg and on Buzzfeed and is an all around great guy. However, Paul might prefer I use the superlative “okay guy.” He is a nice young man, a humble young man. Unfortunately, some people see a nice, fit, good looking young man and they think “twink.” Paul Town is no twink. Paul Town is a force of nature.

A Note on the Interview:

Paul would not do the interview in person even though I was willing to drive wherever to meet him. I usually conduct interviews on Twitter. Sadly, Paul Town is not on Twitter, not anymore. Interested parties should follow him at premium.paul.town.

Fled: Greetings, Paul. Thanks for popping your head out to do this interview. How did Santa Claus treat you? Could he find you???

Paul (PT) Town: Santa was going to give me coal but he realized that was probably not a good idea so he ended up giving me anti-psychotic medication which I take every day because it’s important to take medicine and be a productive member of society, which I am doing on both accounts. There is a famous guy in the early 1900’s who didn’t take antipsychotics and bad things happened.

Fled:

I know what that’s like :winkingsmileyfacefacedemoji

We’ve known each other for ~3 years now, Paul. I remember seeing your avatar’s good looks and how fast you gained followers. Frankly I was jealous. I’m still upset we’ve never met up. It’s almost like you think I’m a jamoke, negging me on the meetup front, Paul. Don’t hold out on me and my readers on this one… You’ve gotta tell us Paul, what are all your normie outlets?

PT: I’ve been busy but at the moment I’m just staying low key because I am trying to be a beneficial member of local communities and working in soup kitchens and charities to help poor people live their best lives.

Fled: Great. That’s great, Paul… Are you coming back to Twitter though? White people need you to get us on the big boards again. You’re too young, too good looking to be Frog Twitter’s Old Ben Kenobi. Do you see what I’m saying, Paul?

PT: I am writing a bit over at premium.paul.town, but mostly I’m cooking food for homeless people and giving money to homeless people in my free time when I’m not working on projects like curing cancer or aids for the homeless people who have cancer and aids.

Fled:

Great, yea…

It’s time for Lightning Round now, Paul. Write a few words about the words before the colons below.

Rascal: The Little Rascals

Hand Grenade: Hand Grenade

Ben Shapiro: A brilliant thinker and stunning constitutional conservative

Paul Town Hall: Didn’t make enough money

Kippa: Kappa

Blade Runner 2049: Not a real story

Rottweiler: Almost as good as a german shepherd.

Fled: Okay, look, I put a note on my neighbor’s boyfriend’s truck to basically say she was sweating me and that she was no good, Paul. Tell me some fun things you’ve done with women.

PT: I’m a heterosexual male, so I have kissed one or two women.

Fled: What would you like to say to my female readers, Paul? Are you single?

PT: I am single, but I’m not looking for a relationship unless the woman is rich and dying soon.

Fled: Two more questions, Paul. Then you need to go find that woman.

First, if the Teletubbies were real and you were one of their executioners, which Teletubby would you want to execute if given the choice by your fucking boss?

PT: I don’t think I could kill any teletubbies. They would probably overpower me.

Fled: Probably. Sure.. Finally, do you have any 2019 plans that you can share with us, Paul? I wanna buy a chair, Paul. Tell me how you’re going to out do me for the fourth year in a row. Go ahead, Paul… tell us.

PT: (In) 2019 I plan on reading some stoic literature such as Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, and others; as well as reading some Epicurius and other people with “Epic” in their names. I also plan on doing more illustrations to pass the time and making drinks with Guarana, L-Tyrosine, and Maca root for energy. I will also be volunteering at food pantries, homeless shelters, disaster relief programs, doing charity work for the mentally disabled in person and also ghostwriting more content for Lauren Southern and Tim Pool. Mainly though 2019 is going to be a lot of self education and self improvement with maybe a video vlog or tweet or blog post here or there as time allows. People need more positive, pro-social outlets and to be encouraged to get involved in helping others in their local communities where they can cause change and tangibly help people and form real friendships more than worrying about national level things that, while they definitely aren’t headed in a good direction, are beyond the scope of influence or control for most if not all people. That’s why I’m spending all my time being a modern Jesus and slaving away helping the poor and sick and also hanging out with prostitutes.

Paul Town, everyone! Paul Town!

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